When we think of domestic violence, we often imagine loud voices and blows. The case we’re looking at today, though it took place in absolute silence, is nonetheless unbearably violent.

Between 2011 and 2020, in the south of France, Dominique Pélicot invited men to rape his wife in her bedroom, while filming them. Why didn’t the victim protest? She was sedated each time and didn’t realise anything. So much so that, when the investigators came to question her about her husband who had been caught filming under girls’ skirts in a shopping centre, she described him as a charming man and a husband who took good care of his family. Her life fell apart when, within minutes, the police asked her if she knew of any other videos found on her husband’s computer showing her naked, unconscious and raped by 83 different men.

Gisèle Pélicot – that’s the name of this woman in her seventies – has decided to have her trial held in camera. To the silence of the nights inflicted on her, she has decided to speak out in the media. Admittedly, this case is causing a stir, and we can deplore the sensationalism of certain newspapers for whom domestic violence was not a subject until now, but now, with this extreme case, it has become a good opportunity to sell papers. In fact, we’re reluctant to write about a subject so often covered in the press. Yet we can’t help but associate our words with Gisèle Pélicot’s historical initiative.

While trials allow victims to engage in a process of reparation by putting words to their suffering, Gisèle Pélicot doubts that she will be able to rebuild her life at her age. But no matter! Words won’t just help her. The trial, which began in September, is an opportunity for feminist concepts to be heard, discussed and remobilised by victims who have undergone suffering similar to that of Mrs Pélicot. They talk about marital rape, consent, patriarchy, male complicity…

Denouncing domestic violence inevitably means talking about the private sphere. But in a male-dominated society, we don’t like to talk about what goes on in the home. And with good reason: socially and historically, this is a woman’s domain. So, by definition, it only interests women. Washing one’s dirty laundry in public would therefore be a waste of time for those who want to take an interest in the real ‘public thing’, i.e. what interests real men.

Except that if you only want to wash your laundry with your family, you don’t make your home any cleaner. Some women rebel against their partners and sometimes pay a high price for it, while others keep quiet and grit their teeth to protect their children. While women keep quiet about the violence they and their children endure in their homes, politicians prefer to denounce the violence in the street and keep quiet about the power relationships within families.

In the case of Mazan (as the trial of Dominique Pélicot and her accomplices was also called), violence in the home and violence on the streets are intertwined. Complete strangers broke into Gisèle’s home to rape her. The men were recruited on the internet by her husband and she had never met them. Of the 83 men in the videos, 51 were identified and arrested at the trial. They were journalists, nurses, workers, the unemployed, firefighters, military personnel, pensioners, IT specialists, drivers, etc. They ranged in age from 22 to 67. They are often fathers. While we sometimes talk about monsters when we hear these sordid stories, it’s not so easy to fall into that trap with this case, because these men represent society as a whole. A damning fact for anyone still wishing to defend the values of the traditional family, as the last bastion against widespread decadence. Not only did the men in the street attack Mrs Pélicot’s integrity, but her home failed to protect her.

At Konflikt, we used to think that power relationships were mainly to be found in the workplace. Cooperation with other organisations concerned with feminist issues and the fact that there are more and more women in the organisation itself have enabled us to take a broader view. To remain silent about domestic violence is to be complicit in it. It means accepting the silence of the Mazan nights. We will no longer remain silent and we fully support the liberating words of the victims of domestic violence. That’s why we invite everyone concerned by this issue to a meeting in our office on Saturday 23rd of November, 17 o’clock.